Also, isn’t it so great to find one of your childhood favorites and get to experience it all over again with your own? Love those books with longevity!
Love the picks here, Alexis -- Imogene's Antlers is one of those titles I remember from my own childhood, and have read my copy many times to my own kiddos with a lot of delight.
I do a few things to combat my imposter syndrome, which pops up only rarely now: 1) I assume *no one* "needs me." There are plenty of other people on Substack writing about children's books, many doing it better than I am; I'm not special and I'm not for everyone -- none of which I can control. So it's a waste of my time, not to mention energy, to worry about what anyone else is doing. 2) I'm a rising-tides-lift-all-boats kind of person. It's completely pointless to me to compete, because writing is so subjective (and picking books to recommend even more so!) There truly is room for us all, and I believe we do better when we support one another. 3) When I feel jealous -- and sometimes I do -- I try to peel back the layers of that to uncover what's underneath; i.e., what do I feel insecure about, where is it coming from, and most importantly, what can I actually do about it (because feeling sorry for myself/envious of someone else's apparent success/whatever it is that's dragging me through the dirt is not actually *doing something,* though the emotions themselves do hold information that can help me take action). 4) I've gotten really tired of my imposter. Like, so so so so so SO bored, I just don't listen anymore.
Way to silence the beast! These are all such great suggestions and I am glad you have found the recipe that helps support others (your support of me has been a game changer on Substack so THANK YOU) and boost your own creativity as well. I know the community does really benefit from your work, whether we “need” it or not!
A great reminder that the imposter voice is just BORING. 🥱 And to ask myself “what’s really going on here” when I start to feel jealous. I’m not sure I struggle with jealousy as much as I do the worth of it...but maybe that’s one in the same.
For me, "the worth of it" is that I have fun. That's it. I want to serve people, for sure, but at the end of the day, I measure the worth by that single metric. I'm not sure I'd be able to keep going, keep creating and writing week after week after week, if I wasn't clear about that. I absolutely have times where I'm like, WHAT IS EVEN THE POINT, WHO CARES, NO ONE IS READING THIS, drama drama drama, but that's all just noise. Jealousy is just one frequency of the noise. But when I was writing for five people, it did it because it was fun, and now that I'm writing for more than five people, I still do it because it's fun. If that changes at any point, okay -- all of my creative projects have always let me know when their time is up and they're ready to be done, and knowing that allows me to just take it one day, one post, at a time, and that works for me.
First off, agreed with everything in this post--actually, this entire series! I think another brilliant angle to all the folks sharing kid's books is our own personal approach to the process and why we select the ones we do. I feel like I get to know the person recommending the book as well. It's a double-win!
Thank you!! I so appreciate your support and agree that the getting to know another wonderful reader and their suggestions is part of the beauty of the thing.
What do you say to kids when you come across a term like 'gypsy' in a book? I try to explain that it's a term people used to use but now could be offensive, unless of course someone uses it about themselves, ... It feels tricky to explain well!
Great question Kathy! I would LOVE to hear what others have to say on this! My kids are very (4&2) little still, so I have approached these types of scenarios in different ways:
1) if I think of it, I’ll edit the text sometimes to a different term. I might have simply subbed this with “woman” or “traveler”
2) If they ask about the term, what it means, I would make sure to point out that it is a word that was used in a negative way, like calling someone a mean name, but also allow the moment to open a conversation about the person in the book and the intent of the word, and what other words could be used instead.
3) Because they are little, if they don’t ask about the term and I don’t think to edit in time, I may not give it power by pointing it out unless I hear them using it in their play or in a slanderous way. For example, my son recently named his stuffed owl an offensive name because it has a sparkly black nose... he has no idea that the word has social implications. If I try to convince him not to use this name, he is more likely to be curious about it, dig in, use it because I’ve made it interesting, etc. but if I don’t say anything, it will likely fall out of fashion with him and his owl will have a new name soon.
I am so open to feedback on how to do this differently or better! Thanks for pointing this out to me and starting the conversation.
Oh and also, I feel like Rory only means "serious" books that will get her into Harvard. Otherwise, I agree, the count seems rather low. I have a love/hate relationship with GG. I love the vibe but the characters themselves really irk me. I could go on a whole diatribe but I'll spare you the misery 😂
Oh I’m so here for the diatribe! I have a love hate - love for nostalgia but as a grown adult I’ve discovered their characters and the messages to be a bit...of the era. Lacking in feminism for a show about women. You know?
100,000%. Also I get that their knowledge of pop culture references was ordained by a higher power but it made them so cliqueish and rude. And my god, Rory is NOT the second coming of Christ, so calm down people. Haha seriously I can really, truly rant about this. Has it stopped me from watching the show countless times? Absolutely not. 😆
I love the community feel and support in all of these posts. It’s a wonderful thing.
I bet 300 is pretty accurate, because kids (including teenagers) are good re-readers! And they have to waste a lot of time on math 😏
But if you count from middle-grade fiction on, and you count rereads, it’s gotta be more.
Ha! All that time on poor math.
Love Imogene's Antlers, I recently found my copy at my dad's house and brought it back for my kids.
And I have loved this series of essays!
Also, isn’t it so great to find one of your childhood favorites and get to experience it all over again with your own? Love those books with longevity!
Yes, it's so fun to see what they like.
Thank you!! I’m so flattered as your posts are gems that I try to sneak in during my busy SAHM days. Thanks for reading!
Thank you! I love having so much mutual joy of reading each others newsletters on Substack.
Love the picks here, Alexis -- Imogene's Antlers is one of those titles I remember from my own childhood, and have read my copy many times to my own kiddos with a lot of delight.
I do a few things to combat my imposter syndrome, which pops up only rarely now: 1) I assume *no one* "needs me." There are plenty of other people on Substack writing about children's books, many doing it better than I am; I'm not special and I'm not for everyone -- none of which I can control. So it's a waste of my time, not to mention energy, to worry about what anyone else is doing. 2) I'm a rising-tides-lift-all-boats kind of person. It's completely pointless to me to compete, because writing is so subjective (and picking books to recommend even more so!) There truly is room for us all, and I believe we do better when we support one another. 3) When I feel jealous -- and sometimes I do -- I try to peel back the layers of that to uncover what's underneath; i.e., what do I feel insecure about, where is it coming from, and most importantly, what can I actually do about it (because feeling sorry for myself/envious of someone else's apparent success/whatever it is that's dragging me through the dirt is not actually *doing something,* though the emotions themselves do hold information that can help me take action). 4) I've gotten really tired of my imposter. Like, so so so so so SO bored, I just don't listen anymore.
Way to silence the beast! These are all such great suggestions and I am glad you have found the recipe that helps support others (your support of me has been a game changer on Substack so THANK YOU) and boost your own creativity as well. I know the community does really benefit from your work, whether we “need” it or not!
A great reminder that the imposter voice is just BORING. 🥱 And to ask myself “what’s really going on here” when I start to feel jealous. I’m not sure I struggle with jealousy as much as I do the worth of it...but maybe that’s one in the same.
For me, "the worth of it" is that I have fun. That's it. I want to serve people, for sure, but at the end of the day, I measure the worth by that single metric. I'm not sure I'd be able to keep going, keep creating and writing week after week after week, if I wasn't clear about that. I absolutely have times where I'm like, WHAT IS EVEN THE POINT, WHO CARES, NO ONE IS READING THIS, drama drama drama, but that's all just noise. Jealousy is just one frequency of the noise. But when I was writing for five people, it did it because it was fun, and now that I'm writing for more than five people, I still do it because it's fun. If that changes at any point, okay -- all of my creative projects have always let me know when their time is up and they're ready to be done, and knowing that allows me to just take it one day, one post, at a time, and that works for me.
Yesssss! I am so in agreement with doing it for the fun of it! It reflects in the work when you do it for the love of it 💕
First off, agreed with everything in this post--actually, this entire series! I think another brilliant angle to all the folks sharing kid's books is our own personal approach to the process and why we select the ones we do. I feel like I get to know the person recommending the book as well. It's a double-win!
Thank you!! I so appreciate your support and agree that the getting to know another wonderful reader and their suggestions is part of the beauty of the thing.
What do you say to kids when you come across a term like 'gypsy' in a book? I try to explain that it's a term people used to use but now could be offensive, unless of course someone uses it about themselves, ... It feels tricky to explain well!
Great question Kathy! I would LOVE to hear what others have to say on this! My kids are very (4&2) little still, so I have approached these types of scenarios in different ways:
1) if I think of it, I’ll edit the text sometimes to a different term. I might have simply subbed this with “woman” or “traveler”
2) If they ask about the term, what it means, I would make sure to point out that it is a word that was used in a negative way, like calling someone a mean name, but also allow the moment to open a conversation about the person in the book and the intent of the word, and what other words could be used instead.
3) Because they are little, if they don’t ask about the term and I don’t think to edit in time, I may not give it power by pointing it out unless I hear them using it in their play or in a slanderous way. For example, my son recently named his stuffed owl an offensive name because it has a sparkly black nose... he has no idea that the word has social implications. If I try to convince him not to use this name, he is more likely to be curious about it, dig in, use it because I’ve made it interesting, etc. but if I don’t say anything, it will likely fall out of fashion with him and his owl will have a new name soon.
I am so open to feedback on how to do this differently or better! Thanks for pointing this out to me and starting the conversation.
Oh and also, I feel like Rory only means "serious" books that will get her into Harvard. Otherwise, I agree, the count seems rather low. I have a love/hate relationship with GG. I love the vibe but the characters themselves really irk me. I could go on a whole diatribe but I'll spare you the misery 😂
Oh I’m so here for the diatribe! I have a love hate - love for nostalgia but as a grown adult I’ve discovered their characters and the messages to be a bit...of the era. Lacking in feminism for a show about women. You know?
100,000%. Also I get that their knowledge of pop culture references was ordained by a higher power but it made them so cliqueish and rude. And my god, Rory is NOT the second coming of Christ, so calm down people. Haha seriously I can really, truly rant about this. Has it stopped me from watching the show countless times? Absolutely not. 😆